Change

Awhile ago, I decided that I needed to read the Bible more. A week or so ago, I decided I should start with the Gospels. However, I was still putting it off, not actually starting. Two days ago, talking with one of my coworkers, he suggested the book of John and told me to start. That night. I read John 1 that night, and John 2 last night, but already on day 2 I almost forgot. This is important, though, I need to keep at it. Ironically enough, just now as I'm reading my book, the author is talking about reading the Bible, immersing yourself in it. I'm not quite to that point, but I'm working up to it I guess. I feel almost half-hearted, working my way up to it, making excuses. I probably need to change this, but I don't know how. I really should turn over a new leaf, start living the life that I claim to live, truly embrace my faith and immerse myself in God's presence and the hope of the Gospel. The problem is, I don't know where to start, what to do, what to change. As a result, I just keep putting it off. I keep saying in there, "this needs to change." You know what? That is not entirely true. What is true is that I need to change. But how to start? And, when? "I can't start this week, I'm too busy." Etc etc etc! It's like cleaning my room; I keep putting it off. I need to change. I don't need to change who I am, but rather in whom I am. I need to focus my life more on Him. But how? When?

Talking about God

Why is it so difficult to talk about God? I can so easily say that "I'm a Lutheran; we believe in the Trinity and infant baptism," but it is incredibly difficult if not impossible for me to say "I believe in God," "I believe in Jesus Christ," or even "I believe" anything. When talking about the Bible, I can talk about the biblical characters all I want, even Jesus as a character, as long as it's in the context of a specific story. However, as soon as I start talking about Jesus as a person or as God, I freeze up. In the same way, it's easy enough to ask people if they go to church and where, and also to answer that question, but is an altogether different situation trying to ask someone what they believe, and even worse to answer that. I can tell people where I go to church and all about what I'm involved in, but I am unable to answer the simple question of "what do you believe?" This needs to change, this needs to be fixed. After all, Jesus saved me. He has given me life, both in this world and forever. I shouldn't be ashamed to talk about it, I should stand certain about the Truth that I believe in.

What is faith to me?

Through the past year or so here at St. Olaf, my experiences and the amazing people around me have gotten me to think about faith. “What is faith to you?” I have asked this question of many of my friends, and countless hours have been spent talking about it, yet I have not reached any definite conclusion. Rather, I’ve found multiple partial-answers and the question seems to generate a certain sense of confusion and even panic that I’ve only ever seen in certain math courses, in physics freshman year, or in the eyes of the music majors in the library the day before their Alice papers are due. It seems to be a question that no one really knows how to answer, and very few seem comfortable even discussing. That aside, faith is an important issue in everyone’s lives, and I think it should be talked about more; it should become a part of the person, a way of life, even the very core of a person’s being.

But in answer to the actual question, what is faith? What is faith to me? I wouldn’t be fair to my roots without a few memorable quotes. Faith is the belief that “God made you special, and He loves you very much,” as the awesome little vegetables tell me every time I watch some Veggietales. Even just that, the simple knowledge that we are His and He loves us, is a lot to live off of. Knowing that we are loved, one of the simplest yet most complex of needs, is so important in one’s life. Just knowing that God loves me no matter what can overwhelm me at times. Who am I, that deserves to be loved? For that matter, who are any of us? But you know what? “God made you special, and He loves you very much!”

Faith isn’t “just” love, either. Faith gives you something to follow. God is there, with you. Talking with my pastor about faith at one point, he compared faith to dancing with God. God is the lead and we are the follows. I’ve always heard that faith is walking with God, but through trusting in Him we can not only walk through life, but dance through life with Him. The music might change, but even if you’re not dancing a quick Lindy Hop or Cha-Cha that day, even if it might be a slow, sad song, He’s still dancing with you and the day will come when you’ll be back to some East Coast or Charleston. "So keep on dancing kid! Jesus is leading!"

As I’ve asked various friends of mine what faith is to them, one of the best answers I’ve received has been from my friend Aaron. As he put it, “faith is an ultimate trust, a trust in something eternal and therefore impossible to fully understand in a human’s lifetime.” I think he’s absolutely right. Even Martin Luther said, “Faith is a living, daring confidence in God's grace, so sure and certain that a man could stake his life on it a thousand times.” In all reality, we do stake our lives on our faith; our salvation depends on it. “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God” (Ephesians 2:8). If I trust God with everything, the troubles of this world seem manageable. This total trust gives me freedom, the freedom to let go of having to figure everything out, the freedom from having to know all the answers.

I’ve quoted all the necessary things: Veggietales, Martin Luther, the Bible, and of course I needed to quote at least one pastor and at least one good friend. Yet I’ve failed to mention one important thing. Faith is love. Faith is trust. And, through these, faith is also hope. Faith is hope for the future, both in this life and forever. This hope provides such joy in my life. As Martin Luther said, “Faith is permitting ourselves to be seized by the things we do not see.” Faith in Christ Jesus has seized me, and I am all the happier for it.

Faith is love, faith is trust, faith is hope, and faith is more than you or I or anyone else could ever hope to describe.

Stumbling Lutherans...

Faith can be a tough concept to be grasped. Whether you are young or old, male or female, it is considered by many in today's culture to be an important aspect in life, an all-important achievement. It's not as easy as people make it out to be, however.

How can you tell if a Lutheran is extroverted? He'll look at YOUR shoes. With this stereotypical Lutheran mentality, many Lutherans glide through life ignoring and hiding any doubts or suspicions they may have. I myself am afraid to mention anything regarding faith struggles to anyone other than my close friends. We Lutherans need to learn how to explore the necessary questions of faith, making us all stronger Christians, rather than pushing them aside and letting them slowly destroy you and your faith, from the inside out.